Is the lockdown making you consider divorce? 

The COVID crisis has forced many couples to spend more time together and many spouses are getting on each other’s nerves. Meanwhile, divorce lawyers around the world are predicting a surge in divorce cases. Is your marriage in danger?

Before you head to divorce court, take the time to do relationship inventory and sort through your marital dynamics to determine whether your marriage can be saved or if it is time to call it quits.

Answer honestly these 7 questions I offer in this guest post in Divorce Magazine to help you gain clarity and make the divorce decision with confidence.

Sonia Frontera is a family attorney, empowerment trainer and domestic violence advocate. She is the proud survivor of an unhappy marriage, a liberating divorce and is living proof that there’s life after separation.  Sonia is the author of the #1 bestseller “Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?”

She loves to hear from readers and can be reached at her internet home.

Sign up for more blog posts and freebies here! And join our Sisterhood on Facebook.

The post Is a COVID Divorce in Your Future? appeared first on Sonia Frontera.

In a culture that’s obsessed with success, that segregates people into winners and losers, those of us who made a mistake picking our life partner can spend the rest of our lives married instead to a label of failure. The concept of the “failed marriage” causes needless suffering: to people recovering from divorce and to those who hang on to unsalvageable marriages to spare themselves of embarrassing feelings of failure. The myth of the failed marriage is only one of the many negative beliefs society inflicts on us and that we accept as truth. But you don’t have to accept this or any other myth that does not serve you. Ending your marriage doesn’t make you a terrible person or a loser; it only makes you and your spouse incompatible.

In this guest post in Divorced Moms, I debunk the myth of a failed marriage.

Sonia Frontera is a family attorney, empowerment trainer and domestic violence advocate. She is the proud survivor of an unhappy marriage, a liberating divorce and is living proof that there’s life after separation.  Sonia is the author of the #1 bestseller “Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?”

She loves to hear from readers and can be reached at her internet home.

Sign up for more blog posts and freebies here! And join our Sisterhood on Facebook.

The post Debunking the Myth of the Failed Marriage appeared first on Sonia Frontera.

August 25^th is Kiss and Make Up Day. With the COVID lockdown bringing too much togetherness, many couples are pondering if they should call it quits or if they should make up.

All couples have their ups and downs, and many can be weathered with love and a commitment to work things out. Filing for divorce is a life-altering decision that should be made carefully and never in haste.

Before you head to your lawyer’s office, do emotional inventory and sort through your marital dynamics to determine whether your marriage can be saved or if it is time to move on.

Here are seven queries to walk you through the process, gain clarity and help you make the divorce decision with confidence.

• Do you still love your partner?

If you no longer love your spouse, it is more humane to get a divorce, so both partners can rebuild their lives and be happy, although separately. If the love is still there, however, investing in the relationship can pay off and spare you from heartache and regret.

• What do you need to be happy in a relationship and can you provide it to one another?

You may not be happy right now, but your marriage can improve if both parties are willing and able to work on it. Understanding your needs and communicating them to your spouse is the first step. Committing to a joint action plan is instrumental.

• Are your spouse’s behaviors offensive to any reasonable person or just to you?

Ponder whether most people find the behaviors that drive you crazy offensive or if they are your personal pet peeves. Some behaviors, like abuse, are deal-breakers. Lesser offenses, like leaving socks on the floor or the toothpaste cap off are annoying. But do they justify ending your marriage?

• Are your spouse’s annoying behaviors mindless, reckless or intended to upset you?

Evaluate whether you are vexed by thoughtless behaviors that can be corrected or if your spouse is hurting you intentionally.

• Do you contribute to relationship strife and can you make changes to reduce discord?

Pay attention to your words and actions and how they affect your relationship. Notice what happens when you try a new approach to situations that create conflict.

• Would you be happier alone?

You deserve to be happy. You are not doing yourself or your spouse any favors by staying in a relationship that makes you miserably unhappy.

• Are you afraid that, if you leave, you will regret it later?

Approximately 50 percent of divorced couples regret having divorced and wish they had worked harder at saving their marriages. If you are worried that you will be sorry you divorced, give your relationship one last chance before you say goodbye.

Sonia Frontera is a family attorney, empowerment trainer and full-time doggie mom. She is the proud survivor of an unhappy marriage, a liberating divorce and is living proof that there’s life after separation.  Sonia is the author of the #1 bestseller “Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?”

She loves to hear from readers and can be reached at her internet home.

Sign up for more blog posts and freebies here! And join our Sisterhood on Facebook.

The post Should You and Your Spouse Kiss and Make Up? appeared first on Sonia Frontera.

(908) 881-5095

sonia@soniafrontera.com

http://www.soniafrontera.com/

Is Getting a Divorce Your New Year’s Resolution?

Seven Questions You Should Answer Honestly Before Ending Your Marriage

LAMBERTVILLE, NJ—January 6, 2020

If your marriage is in trouble, the new year is the perfect time to assess the state of your union. Some people vow to make their marriages better. Others are debating whether they should get divorced.

Ending a marriage can be intimidating. But it doesn’t have to be, says Sonia Frontera, a collaborative divorce attorney, empowerment trainer and author of Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?

“All couples have their ups and downs, and many can be weathered with love and a commitment to work things out. Filing for divorce is a life-altering decision that should be made carefully and not in haste.”

Before you head to your lawyer’s office, Frontera recommends doing emotional inventory and sorting through your marital dynamics to determine whether your marriage can be saved or if it is time to move on.

Frontera offers seven queries to walk you through the process, gain clarity and help you make the divorce decision with confidence.

1. Do you still love your partner? If you no longer love your spouse, it is more humane to get a divorce, so both partners can rebuild their lives and be happy, although separately. If the love is still there, however, investing in the relationship can pay off and spare you from heartache and regret.
2. What do you need to be happy in a relationship and can you provide it to one another? You may not be happy right now, but your marriage can improve if both parties are willing and able to work on it. Understanding your needs and communicating them to your spouse is the first step. Committing to a joint action plan is instrumental.
3. Are your spouse’s behaviors offensive to any reasonable person or just to you? Ponder whether most people find the behaviors that drive you crazy offensive or if they are your personal pet peeves. Some behaviors, like abuse, are deal-breakers. Lesser offenses, like leaving socks on the floor or the toothpaste cap off are annoying. But do they justify ending your marriage?
4. Are your spouse’s annoying behaviors mindless, reckless or intended to upset you? Evaluate whether you are vexed by thoughtless behaviors that can be corrected or if your spouse is hurting you intentionally.
5. Do you contribute to relationship strife and can you make changes to reduce discord? Pay attention to your words and actions and how they affect your relationship. Notice what happens when you try a new approach to situations that create conflict.
6. Would you be happier alone? You deserve to be happy. You are not doing yourself or your spouse any favors by staying in a relationship that makes you miserably unhappy.
7. Are you afraid that, if you leave, you will regret it later? Approximately 50 percent of divorced couples regret having divorced and wish they had worked harder at saving their marriages. If you are worried that you will be sorry you divorced, give your relationship one last chance before you say goodbye.

Book blurb: Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist? offers women a roadmap for the journey from an unhappy marriage to personal freedom in or out of the relationship. It contains tools to assess the viability of their marriages, decide whether the relationship can be repaired or if it is time to call it quits, and provides strategies to create lasting positive changes in their psyches and lives.

The book, published by Coventina House, retails for $13.99 and is available through all major wholesalers and on the Web at a variety of electronic bookseller sites, or directly from www.soniafrontera.com .

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To the Media: Sonia Frontera can provide advice, story ideas, articles, background and commentary. She responds quickly to media requests. Contact her at sonia@soniafrontera.com or by phone at (908) 881-5095.

Visit Sonia Frontera’s Website http://www.soniafrontera.com, Connect with her on Twitter http://twitter.com/FronteraSonia and on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/sistersguides/.

Sonia Frontera’s high-resolution photo is at http://www.flickr.com/photos/soniafrontera/

The post Tip Sheet: 7 Questions You Should Answer Honestly Before Ending Your Marriage appeared first on Sonia Frontera.

Jonathan Wall, PsyD

The post Editorial Review: A Positive and Constructive Way to Face the Challenges in One’s Marital Relationship appeared first on Sonia Frontera.

Contemplating divorce? You may still have time to save your relationship. The experts reveal what divorced couples wished they had done differently to save their marriages.

Check out this article by Carolyn Steber published on Bustle, featuring Sonia Frontera, author of “Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?”

Now that you know, don’t let it happen to you!

Sonia Frontera is a family attorney, empowerment trainer and full-time doggie mom. She is the proud survivor of an unhappy marriage, a liberating divorce and is living proof that there’s life after separation.  Sonia is the author of the #1 bestseller “Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?”

She loves to hear from readers and can be reached at her internet home.

Sign up for more blog posts and freebies here! And join our Sisterhood on Facebook.

The post What Divorced Couples Wish They Had Done Differently – The Experts Weigh In, Featuring Sonia Frontera appeared first on Sonia Frontera.

Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?: Get Clear, Get Strong and Get Off the Fence. A Roadmap to Freedom … Sister’s Guides to Empowered Living, Book 1 may sound like a whimsically accessible read, but the sense of fun in the subtitle is actually an invitation to enter a serious exploration that provides women with keys to assessing the viability and potential of their own marriages.

Sonia Frontera maintains that divorce, while an option, should be approached with an active awareness of underlying attitudes about relationships that may have contributed to stagnation or dangerous situations. Readers are encouraged to self-analyze their marriage’s dynamics and their own attitudes. This approach requires a strong ability to self-assess and a desire to consider changes not only within the relationship, but in one’s choices, attitudes, and decisions.

Solve the Divorce Dilemma is not a pro- or anti-divorce treatise, but one which encourages readers to enter this analysis with eyes wide open. One might argue that this approach is best utilized with the aid of a licensed therapist, but Frontera’s book is meant to supplement professional help; not replace it. Think of it as a self-study workbook of exercises and tools that can be utilized either at home or with the assistance of a professional.

The processes of getting clear, getting strong, and perhaps getting out are outlined in chapters that cover everything from the fallout from social programming and its impact on womens’ lives to what constitutes awareness, and how to cultivate it on many levels.

Women who have traditionally led unexamined lives will be surprised at many of these insights, while those committed to real self-examination and change will be the best beneficiaries of a book that guides them through common pitfalls and obstacles to paths that lead in a more positive direction.

Another important facet of Solve the Divorce Dilemma lies in its many important daily insights, from missing or ignoring red flags about caustic behaviors in relationships to weighing the consequences of divorce and possible regret over decisions leading to it. In order to mitigate such regrets, it’s important for women to assess all reasonable opportunities for change within the relationship as well as outside of it (abusive situations being the exception to this rule).

From cultivating forgiveness to approaching one’s spouse with a request for divorce and handling the fallout from different kinds of reactions, Solve the Divorce Dilemma covers the entire emotional process. It is highly recommended reading for anyone interested in making lasting changes in their psyches and lives. These keys to change go beyond a singular relationship to probe how to make choices, react to adversity, and, ultimately, envision freedom and self-love.

D. Donovan, Senior Reviewer, Midwest Book Review

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Did you know that between 32% and 50% of divorced people regret ending their marriages? Do not let that happen to you! Read this article I published on Divorce Magazine, the #1 divorce blog!

The post Do Not Be a Victim of Divorce Regret! appeared first on Sonia Frontera.

Not all is lost. Before you throw in the towel, check out this article by Kristine Fellizar published on Bustle, featuring Sonia Frontera, author of “Solve the Divorce Dilemma: Do You Keep Your Husband or Do You Post Him on Craigslist?”

The post Steer Your Relationship Away from Divorce appeared first on Sonia Frontera.